A OK

Some friends have asked me to step in here and lend a hand in trying to help to understand some of things. I am not anybody’s teacher or guru. Apparently, however, you have stumbled into an area where I happen to work, and so it was thought that I might be able to bring some of my insight and expertise to the situation.

In a way, Enlightenment is a two edged sword. While it brings knowledge, insight and wisdom, it also separates us from others. When you know the truth yourself personally, then you are not fooled by the b.s. from those who don’t truly know. In other words, you’re out there on your own. And that might mean leaving the comfort of being a dutiful, unquestioning member of your sangha. It might mean, seemingly, going against established rules and traditions and the many people who adhere to them. And, looking around you, and not finding anyone else who seems to have had your experiences, it might seem that you are all alone. I know how gratifying it can be to pick up a book and find affirmation for your experiences that someone else may also have had at some time. And, when seeking validation, it is all the more satisfying when you can find it amongst the records of your greatest heroes, such as Buddha.

I also know how unsettling an experience like this can be. I don’t think that questions of ones sanity are as much forefront in one’s mind, (probably because the experience is so very “real”), as are questions about its possible consequences. If you have heard your share of stories about self annihilation, or possibly the lose of self through absorption into some cosmic ocean of great being, or that you really don’t have any self – its all just a delusion. And yet, your experience does not tally with these stories, some confusion can ensue.

You know for a fact that your self is not lost and that there is something else “there”, not void. And, perhaps this is when you realize that you have one of two choices, either start your own new religion – a daunting task to be sure - or else, you can try to reinterpret your traditional religion in the light of your own experiences. Seemingly, you have chosen the latter.

Also, I would gather when you write: “reminds me of cockroaches who scuttle away to hide in the darkness” and “I don't belong to any sect in Buddhism because I find them all corrupt.” that you are brimming with righteous zeal. Believe me, I can understand all of your self-assuredness and desire for everyone to attain enlightenment; all of the frustration, contempt and anger that you feel.

However, the beauty of having an experience such as yours is that it enables you to see the truth that is within all of the Dharma, all the sects, within all the scriptures. It allows you to bring the dharma to life, and to have it make sense for people. To bring wisdom to the imponderable, clarity to the confusing and the conflicting, revelation to the unseen.

It furthers one greatly to reflect less on the magnitude of one’s accomplishment, and more on the experience itself. Trying to “squeeze” as many of its magnificent mysteries into your realization as you can. You can respect the sages of times past and try to understand what it was that they found in the Truth, rather than just dismissing their words because their experience does not, at least superficially, seem to agree with yours.

I find it very fruitful to really reflect on a passage that I would otherwise immediately dismiss, trying to see it from the perspective of the author (and usually seeing that, in the context of what they were writing, or in the greater overall reality that yes, I could agree with this in such a such a way). Sure, there are misinterpretations in the texts here and there. And perhaps one teacher may have more or less of an understanding than another, while some apparently none at all. Rather than pointing to their flaws, I would rather affirm what it is of the truth that they do have. Perhaps it will blossom. And believe me, I did not come to realize all of these views right away either, but only after many years of dedicated practice.

At the threshold of Truth it is sometimes surprising how many of our cherished notions we must sacrifice to gain admittance. And upon our return, how many of the ancient truths are reinvigorated with a greater meaning. So, for me, my understanding of Buddhism has continued to broaden. And, perhaps one of the most challenging yet pertinent issues for me to assimilate is that even in the context of dependent origination there is room for free will and choice. And, that even in the context of endless rebirths there is room for people to purposely choose to come to this physical plane for their own very specific reasons and lessons..

I can understand that you might not care to see things this way, and that you might prefer a more narrow interpretation of Buddhist philosophies. But for me, this has meant that people have come here intending to have just the experiences that they are having. That is, choosing to be ignorant, or to stubbornly believe in a particular view, choosing to be crassly materialistic or perhaps generous, choosing to have gifts, or to be talentless. And, that they make these particular choices for their own very personal reasons within the context of their ultimate highest good.

This has meant, consequently, that not everyone is ready for or wants enlightenment. How disappointing!! It also means that I must deeply respect and honor these people and their (to my former way of thinking, flawed) choices. Because they are working through, in the way that is best suited to them, their gifts and problems and difficulties. So that they can assimilate and learn the lessons that they need to realize. It does not, however, mean that I should just abandon them to their own negative devices, but instead offer them hope when I can, and the gift of a greater truth when I have the chance, and to the degree that it fits in with their life’s work.

I think, therefore, that it is important for us to offer people help on the terms that they can accept it in. Not demanding that they abandon the ship that they have been traveling in, to take up the path that we approve of, but which would be unknown, foreign and less certain to them. Just because we happen to say, and know, that it is the right one for us. Nor does this mean that I am an everyman, able to help all who comes along. I am sure that there are many for whom I am quite ill suited to help, I accept this and move on to where I might be better suited to work. But then, as I mentioned earlier, I am not a teacher at all.

Approaching and working with people on their terms is so much more rewarding too. It’s like being an artist who works in different media. Certainly one would not approach doing an oil painting the same way one would do a collage or a piece of computer art or a lost wax sculpture. Sometimes, some of the same principles can be ported over from one media to the next, but to get the most out of a particular media, you have to know its strengths and its weaknesses, and how to use its strengths to make that work shine. And people are much more complex, of course, than any art work. This is the kind of compassion I try to bring to people: to understand that they are going through their life’s work in the way that they need to, for their own greater development. And, to try to help them in a way that fits in with their journey.

I know that this can be quite difficult. Because sometimes you just want to say to people: “Look I know the truth, and this is how it is, and your notions are completely wrong.” But, how much more interesting it is that the Great Way can take in all of these many and divergent views and realize a whole of them. It is like the question: how can It be so empty when It is so full. To me this has turned out to be a much, much better universe and greater reality.

Well, I’ve probably bored you for long enough with my quaint little homilies. Please forgive me if I have taken for granted your ignorance on any particular subject, when instead you are quite knowledgeable on it. Lastly, let me please implore you do dip into the greater sphere again and again. And when its mysteries, its unknowability is as your body and life, then you will breath into the life of your “being” its truth and ineffable substance. And that will be more of a guide to others than any book can be. Best wishes to you as you travel your path of revelation and mystery.